We have all had one of those moments when we are completely mortified by something that happened to us; one of those times we just wish we could disappear or transport ourself elsewhere. When we look back the situation really does not seem as serious as when we were in the middle of it; thank goodness for retrospect.
One of those times happened to me several years ago. My dad and I planned a trip to Scottsdale to meet up with several of my cousins from Michigan. We all live so far apart it was a great opportunity to get together and catch up. During this time I was pre-menopausal, for the women reading who have been through that, I’m sure you understand. For everyone else, during pre-menopause, a woman’s monthly cycle becomes unpredictable to say the least. Sometimes there is barely any flow and other times there are major flood conditions. It was at lunch in Scottsdale, with my cousins and my dad when the latter happened. I really had no idea until I excused myself to go to the restroom.
Uh, oh. I was wearing a dress at the time and the back of it was stained a bright, crimson red. It was not really that big of a spot but it felt as large as a football field. I debated whether to just stay in the bathroom and hopefully disappear or look for a window I could climb out of and run! Too bad I couldn’t just flush myself down the toilet! How could I go back out there, cross a restaurant full of guests, and face my family with this stain of shame? I sopped up as much as I could with paper towel, bought a new pad from the convenient machine on the wall, took a deep breath and went back out to the dining room. I was certain that everyone’s eyes were on the back of my dress. How I wished I had a red pen that I could have decorated the rest of the dress to match! How could my body play such a dirty trick on me when I was way more than running distance from home?
Back at the table the family was just finishing up and hoping to take group pictures in front of the restaurant. Oh no! I took a quick check of the chair I was sitting on but all was well there. I made sure to fall in behind the group. None of the other people at the restaurant would most probably ever see me again since I live 300 miles away; go ahead and look! At the front door of the restaurant the family paused for their group shot. I looked around for a rock I could crawl under but no such luck. Since I was not the tallest in the group I would have to be in front. Maybe if I stand a bit sideways no one will notice? Finally, we were done with the group pictures and hugs.
My dad and I made it back to his car and we were on our way. Today, writing about this, it seems so silly that I was so upset by something I am sure has happened to other women but this type of talk is normally verboten other than in a doctor’s office. The main thing is, we humans take ourselves way too seriously sometimes. Being open and taking one of my female cousins aside and telling her about it may have helped but I had not seen them in years! I guess the takeaway from this lesson is don’t sweat the small stuff and always remember to laugh at yourself from time to time. No one is perfect.
